I'll share a very little bit about our IPs. They are a straight couple that lives in our state- they have one child already, but for medical reasons, the intended mother cannot carry any more pregnancies. That's all I will share for the moment, because while I want to be really transparent about this process and what it's like to be a surrogate, I also want to respect their privacy and their journey through this. And because I won't be sharing their real names, I have named them Zack and Kelly for ease of mention during all of this :)
Let's rewind. Back when we went to Madison I didn't have a clear vision of who I wanted to carry for- I just want to help someone who needs it. I kind of envisioned being matched with a gay couple, and after our meetings, I said if I could cherry pick, I would pick an international gay couple. I was nervous about the relationship I might have with an intended mother who was using surrogacy as a last resort because her body wasn't on her side, whereas a gay couple is typically just excited that someone is willing to do this for them because they always knew they couldn't do it themselves (or so I'm told). I kept my application open though, because I wasn't set on carrying for a gay couple. When I got the call that we were matched I was a little caught off guard that we were matched with a straight couple (though in hindsight, I can see how this stacked up and should not have been surprised!). I want to stress that I was truly just caught off guard and in no way was I disappointed.
Unsurprisingly, our match seems pretty close to perfect- the women at our agency are really good at their jobs. I can only carry as a surrogate one time, since I have had 3 previous c-sections (this is a hard rule in the world of 3rd party reproduction), and our IPs only want one more child. I had been feeling sad/guilty that I wouldn't be able to do a sibling project for my IPs (before being matched) because I just assumed they wouldn't already have children, so it was such a relief to be put into this match where the only expectation/desire is one healthy baby.
For our meeting, we met at one of the agency's offices with two of the three founders of the agency and our IPs. We discussed why we were all there, what our opinions were on different aspects of the pregnancy, the timeline, and a lot of other things like the Spice Girls and the antics of toddlers. After our meeting, we went out to dinner just the 4 of us. It was a lot like what I imagine a blind date to be, but Kelly and I did end up sharing our dinner, so I guess you can say we are jumping right in. I might even have her baby in the next year or so ;)
After leaving dinner, I emailed the agency to let them know that we wanted to move forward with the match, and this morning, they emailed back to let me know that they were on the way to drop off my file at the fertility clinic, because Zack and Kelly also wanted to move forward! Our timeline feels long but I'm sure it will move right along- the next step is for me to get a medical clearance from the fertility clinic that we are working with. We are all hoping that this will happen sometime this summer so that we can be on track to do an embryo transfer in December (the soonest my dr. will sign off on). Stay tuned! :)
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| A blog post isn't a blog post without a picture, right? This is all I have from our "meeting" even though this was pre-meeting. Spoiler alert: I went with the mules on the left. |
